How to become an Alien?

How to become an Alien?

Let me say a few words about Ceylon, to begin with.

It is very easy.

YOU just become a politician and get elected to the parliament.

From the time of the election and oath taking ceremony in the parliament you are like an Alien.
The police treat you like a special ENTITY only an alien could claim in Ceylon.

You never see them in the respective electorates.

Only hear them giving edited false information to the media until the parliament is dissolved and NEXT election is called in.

In Ceylon politicians are a special kind of Aliens but my intention is for an average citizen to become one and live happy ever after in any country in this world.


How?

1. Destroy (if you have one) the Birth Certificate and just declare that you have no document proof to say “You were ever born” on this planet but a celestial entity.
 
The benefits are enormous.

2. If You are in India, they will treat YOU like a God and build a temple in your name. 
You have to adopt a name like “Sai Baba” but not Sai Baba but “Reborn Sai Baba-R.S.B would do.
 
Or Reborn Jaya Lalitha (R.J.L).

3. In Ceylon, they will treat You like an ambassador, and then issue you an Alien Passport (Illegal) and send you to the underworld after the first assigned official work is finished.

Two benefits.
 
The finance Minister along with Prime Minister will pay you a courtesy visit.
The first official engagement is signing a foreign loan agreement.
 
Moment you finish with the politicians, the Drug Mafia will visit You and they want YOU to make a special money laundering engagement with celestial beings in Gold and Silver and not in Paper Currency or dollars!

Gold include what was left behind by the L.T.T.E. and all confiscated at Katunayake Airport.

4. In U.K. they make you an IRA agent.
 
Not the terrorist lot now defunct or in legislature NOW.
IRA stands for person without an Inland Revenue Agent or declaration form.

A special category declared by MI5 and MI6.

You are exempt from paying taxes including the VAT.
The kind of operation is similar to Ceylon but all your Gold and Silver (including ill-gotten money converted to gold) is stored in Mars for safety.

5. Now come to America.
You are not allowed to enter the New York city.
You are not allowed a Valid Visa but You can remain eternally anywhere within the Air Port (see the Terminal film please) but with a little difference.

Since you have an Alien Passport, the airport authority takes over your passport and put it in a special locker and call the CIA, NSA and the FBI.
 
Now these guys have no place or strategy since Mr. Trump is confirmed by the electoral colleagues.
They ask money to establish a special branch in the precinct of the New York Air Port.

Then they build a special complex with special ventilation mechanism to avoid Alien Viruses infecting the World.

Part of the Area 51 technology is brought in, to reverse engineer the putative Alien Craft.

You must pretend You can build one by mere Mental Energy and Meditative concentration but won’t talk until a safe island is built for YOU, offshore.

6.This is where the Chinese will come in.

They win the contract for building an artificial Island and the infra-structure to house the Alien Space Craft.

They will also have a covert operation to reverse engineer the Craft.

7. What will happen in Russia?

You will be treated like SNOWDEN, first at the air port (similar to New York) with red carpet for three years of viral quarantine and thereafter Siberia so that no Alien journalist can reach YOU except over the Internet.

This list can go on until all the countries in the world are covered (except the purely Catholic countries- re Aliens do not exist belief) with their idiosyncrasies superimposed.

8. What about Vatican?
 
They will archive YOU in FROZEN state (until the revisit of the Jesus is declared) for another 100 years if necessary.

No offense is meant to Christians, Methodists, Catholic or any alien denomination one belongs to and who are celebrating Christmas in style.

9. What will happen if the alien is in Saudi Arabia?

They will tag you a Nuclear Bomb and send you to Iran Nuclear facility for reinforcements and Alien enrichment.

10 What will happen in the UNO?
Nothing!

According to their documents no Aliens exist on this planet.