Yes Man's Luck and the Pedigree Dog's Exit

You might not realize that the pelican's misadventure with our yes man has resulted in some interesting chain of events.

He tuned up immediately at the heaven's doorstep with a certificate not signed and left blank by our pelican.

It was soon checked to see whether it was authentic and was found to be a true copy given by our pelican.

He had to stay till pelican returned from earth from his routine rounds for further verification.

In the meantime the Maha's Assistant let him sort out the mail and the documents for the next round of delivery.

His demeanor was very appealing to him and asked the yes man whether he could be an assistant to him for three or four days till pelican returns.

True to his nature he said yes, yes.

Eventually pelican returned and when he was asked whether he knew about the yes man.

Or Yes he is my yes man and when I asked him whether he is ready to die without any hesitation he said yes and that was why he had to abruptly stop his training in mid air.

Given some training he could fly any plane anywhere with at least three more pilots provided that he does not manipulate the flying gear but coordinate his actions with the air hostesses at the rear at meal times was his reply,

With this recommendation Maha's Assistant was very impressed.

When Maha gave a call from vacation to ask how the things are at heaven, assistant told him the story of the yes man and asked whether he could take some leave and appoint the yes man in his absence.

Maha asked why not leave altogether and return to earth and learn some tricks from Paraya dogs so that you can follow suit just like the clever Paraya dog who attained Nibbana with no entry request.

Besides. you have been very helpful to me and this is the longest vacation I have had in all my life and you have found a suitable candidate to take your reins, I have no more questions from you and said Good Bye and Good Luck till we see again from earth may be in about 15 years time.

Our pedigree dog turned Maha's Assistant soon afterward call our yes man and asked him whether he is ready to take over.

He promptly said yes.

Just before he left he told him, you are Maha's Assistant and nothing more.

I knew it from the very beginning Sir he said.

How come?

You never took responsibility and let others take responsibility of your actions and that is the type of job I was looking forward and comfortable.

I could never take responsibility on earth and neither in heaven too, he said.

You are too good to be here and this arrangement is mutual and when you do come back here I will say yes to anything you ask including the job back.

No dear, I now have a better strategy than that but I have to learn the finer points from a Paraya dog.

The last Paraya dog whom I met was so clever before I could ask any help he was gone with the wind.

I have to meet some of his relatives in Sri-Lanka and will be back soon in about 15 years.

Till then Good Bye.

As he went he heard somebody saying Yes Sir!

Pelican Story

He was an ex-income tax officer who was seen as good choice for help for Mahana Brahma's Assistant not only as a Flying Officer but also as a delivery man. 
Pelicans are known to deliver babies to mums at least when the second one arrives unexpectedly and the first one born asks the silly question from where the hell the second one came.

The pelican come into operational requirement of mothers often in the West but not so much here in Sri-Lanka.

In this context as a delivery man he does not have to deliver babies but all what he has to do is to drop baskets full of documents to sea often containing false declarations made by expectant candidates for their next round of birth and to get favours from Maha Brahma's Assistant.

When he thinks something is cooked up especially coming from Sri-Lanka, the assistant delvers them to the pelican to be dropped to sea so that the ink and all the forgeries are wiped out by the ocean currents ( the ocean can take any rubbish come what it may).

On his return pelican has to pick few of them back to heaven and the assistant checks to see if any merits are left tangled with the soggy paper and if not delivers them straight to Appaya (AI) International with a tag number for prompt action.

At AI the soggy paper is irradiated with UV light and then a special black ink is sprayed and that is when all the Papa Karmas are exposed for my equation to take cognizant and automatic reprisal by Apaya authorities.

Unlike in the heaven my equation has to be modified when new crimes like that are committed by American investors and speculators are discovered.

Very severe scrutiny is done unlike the Federal Regulators of USA.

The pelican is the go between the Apaya and the Heaven.

In some cases when the documents are landed on high ground or floating ice there is a chance some might escape the sea currents and get a respite but if they are discovered on a subsequent birth it is not the pelican who is punished but the holder of the certificate.

Pelican has no jurisdiction in matters of merits and demerits but only a go between and a mechanism of delaying merits or demerits so that backlog is prevented at the any entry point be that it may be Apaya or Heaven.

Pelican navigation skill are considered to be complimentary to the operational mechanics.

How he became a trainer Flying Officers was purely an accident by meeting our crab and the tortoise at the lake side.

He was offered foreign currency initially by the Air Marshal but when he decided to pay that in Sri-Lankann equivalent of Rupees he really got annoyed since neither Apaya nor Heaven recognize Sri-Lankan Rupees.

That is why he deserted the Flying Operations in mid air.

I have suggested to remedy this situation soon with a plastic card that automatically converts itself of the credit balance to the currency type moment the airspace of the country is entered but there are few navigational glitches / hitches when the pelican decides to stay in border zones like Palk Straight and the likes.

It is currently worn around the pelican neck and it has dual responsibility of location guide and a currency conversion. Once it is tested to Apaya satisfaction it will be used by our pelican and he may decide to return to his substantive post on Earth but that is all at his discretion.

How come the pelican becoming a Flying Trainer?

The pelican was his annual pilgrimage to Ceylon to avoid harsh winter and got trapped in the Batticoloa floods and was waiting to devour some unfortunate sea fish that have come ashore. When he was about to partake the first mouthful of fish in came the Tortoised Chief Minister (TCM) from nowhere and warned him not to do so.

He was puzzled.

I have been eating fish all my life how dare you intervene in my cuisine.

Brother do not be annoyed.

Be calm.

I will tell you the reason.

They are poisoned by accident and not by purpose or design.

We got a consignment of food for flood victims from UNO and in the transport of it on a vehicle with fertilizer by some strange coincidence the bags' label changed from UNO to USA and a certain politician in Colombo decided that they were no good for human consumption and not even for animals.

Then the local politician requested that they were to be dumped into sea.

The transport man designed a coup.

The food items were quickly changed hands with a label UREA and UREA was changed to USA by substituting S for EA. Then only a few UREA bags that contained deadly cadmium were dumped with political acumen to the sea in front of starving residents and they were asked to go fishing in troubled waters!

So you may now go fishing in troubled waters!

The pelican was visibly annoyed.

I traveled over 8000 miles to land hear on my holidays and you guys spoil it for me.

Don't you people advertise come here and tither?

Sorry for the misadventure it would have been a different story if the weather gods did not intervene.

The TCM said in a quiet voice.

You may go down further and find another island he suggested.

There are no islands till Antarctica and I haven't got the strength to fly that far.

Then he asked are you good in navigation.

Yes of course and if I may ask you why you raised that question?

Even though I am here I still have some connection with the Air Force Top Brass and I can fix you a job with them till spring with full on board service.

He was not happy but picked the crab instead and took to flight and landed on a tree top.

He tried hard to pierce the shell bone but could not and in with anger dumped the fellow down but it landed with a thud and turned upside up downside down and side tracked safely to water.

This he has never seen before and went back to the now friendly TCM and asked how come the shell of a Sir-Lankan crab is so hard?

Elementary my dear!

He was in charge of my armed car when in service.

He was also in charge of making service to my vehicle with three quotation which is the usual practice.

He was given the bullet proof metal sample for verification.

He without my knowledge changed the specification to inferior quality metal and hid the real metal sample under his helmet and pocketed out the contract extras.

Then in the final blast of which we all died in an unfortunate accident the metal got stuck to his skin.

He is a hard nut in any case and difficult even for me to pierce his intentions!

In that case I say yes to your offer with some reservation.

That was how the pelican was made a the flying trainer for healthy remuneration.

You have to wait why he quit and deserted the post for my next edition on web.

Keep counting the SiRs please.

Good bye!

Please note even though these stories are quite akin to Buddhist stories and anthology, they are not designed for Dhamma sermons and any recitals without my implied consent will be strictly prohibited.

PS.

The chief minister who took over from the TCM was mildly hurt when in a routine test a bullet pierced the serviced part of the vehicle and went inside. It was an indirect hit; that is why the injuries were minimal.

He quickly dumped the vehicle to junk and bought a new one from the fresh quota allocated to him. He did not forget to send a telegram to the ex-officer thanking him for his service acumen.

I had to deliver it through my special courier service in conjunction with Apaya International.