Dream 34

This was unusually short but scary dream.

I was woken up late afternoon at 3 P.M. by the dog barking, for me to open the door for my wife who had gone to see her doctor.

The flu that was going around in our house was not a total disaster as far as I was concerned. I was getting a big dose of dreams but unfortunately, I can remember only a few.

The plight or the outcome of the above dream could have been the same if the dog did not intervene in the thick of it, which is not his habit anyway.

I was the master of ceremony at a wedding reception. I was (unfortunately) invited to be one of the witnesses of the registration of the marriage.

I have the habit of refusing to do that (I wish I could have the option to refuse my actual ceremony, now that I am already writing a book on Myth, Mirage and Marriage for young ones who may or may not embark on this feat on an Airbus in Sri-Lankan Airspace. It looks like all Sri-Lankan flights are like Wedding on high space or stratosphere anyway.)

I cannot remember whether I was appearing for the bride or the bridegroom.

It does not matter.

I am going to send  this to Maha the, Greatest and I will get those minor details which I cannot remember from him, in the body of the interpretation.

I will be brief here since the interpretation from Maha was very, very long and interesting.

As as usual I was on site, on time and it did not look like a Airbus but a Skyscraper of many flights and almost touching the stratosphere and I was feeling dizzy having reached the dizzy heights.

I went to the toilet in case I throw my breakfast on the dancing floor and had a very light touch up of my personality and got seated on an easy chair with panoramic view (of all the invitees entering) of the lobby.

The idea was to take cover if any of my doctor friends or enemies (mainly politicians in low offices since they are jealous I occupy one of their tasks; for me it is no different whether I am signing a birth certificate, death certificate or a report of an untreatable cancer) would join the party.

I was an early bird and little while later the registrar came with a commando outfit giving him protection.

I thought to myself, this must be wedding of a son or daughter of a commanding officer.

Then an Imam came with his retinue which looked liked a guerrilla outfit and took up the position covering him from all directions.

He had a book which looked like Kuran in his hand.

The outfit had something like machetes or similar ancient battle outfits

I was not sure whether they were protecting the Kuran, the Imam or both.

I had a second look to see whether he was our veteran Fousi but he did not look liked him.

Little later an old Pusari came in with an outfit which looked no different from LTTE commando outfit in combat.

They were holding a banana leaf over his head and I could not see his face.

By this time I was feeling the thump in my heart wondering whether I landed on the wrong footage.

Then, in a little while  a personality who looked liked the Pope came in and he had Royal Air Force cover.

He was the only one who came in with his own seat which looked like an inclined flat boat with  three rockets like structures in front.

The bottom had a hovercraft type of cushion and it looked amazingly modern outfit, fit for a modern Pope.

The air force was in full attention not at ease.

Then a tiny chap came in with a huge elephantine wardrobe squarish, suitable for a library and it had four locks on all four sides but the guy did not have the keys in his hand but a remote control to control the wheels and a something similar to a tablet computer console.

Then, after some delay a Buddhist monk came in with a laptop in his hand and with no escort.

He also had a remote control which he pointed to the huge wardrobe and opened and closed each one of the locks as if he was checking integrity by a remote control and took up a high seat.

The look of him was very reassuring and I felt the pump in my heart easing off almost to a stall or standstill.

With all this entrees almost 50% of the floor was occupied and little by little invitees arrived filling the vacant seats.

Then of course before I could witness the arrival of the bride and the bridegroom, I was woken up and missed the full scenario.

I have to sent this to Maha for him to fill in the blanks in my memory and the appropriate interpretation and to reveal the missing second half of the dream.

As usual the Maha, the Greatest of all Gods responded almost instantly.

Why are you still sweating?

I said I had a thump in the heart which eased off with the arrival of the monk but with the global warming in full flight, the sweat does not dry up easily.

I asked him was it a funeral or a wedding.

A wedding, my boy.

I was there to witness the registration, was n’t it?

Wrong.

I was there to see that the proceeding went on smoothly.

No.

I was on official duty.

Sort of.

I had to be there to examine the putative couple for their correct sex.

No, why, Maha asked.

Now these guys wear Unisex Jeans, sometime it is difficult to say one is a boy or a girl.

Not like good old days.

Why on hell I was there?

It looked like hell anyway.

You were there to take blood samples.

To check the bride pregnant or not?

Urine sample would do it, know and a technician can do that without a doctor.

Why me?

You know this story is futuristic like all your previous ones.

There is a new wedding protocol.

By testing Blood?

I don’‘t get you.

It is called an ethnicity test.

Each ethnic group has to have a blood test and depending on the result the wedding ceremony takes its course.

That is why all the dignitaries are there.

When one announces the result there is the very drawn out deliberation to fit the guy and the girl into the ethnic protocol.

This is Greek to me.

Can you tell me you are pure Sinhala.

No sir.

Not a Tamil or Muslim.

No.

You don’t have Caucasian blood?

No.

Why?

We are a mixed race Sir, one cannot say by a blood test that on is Sinhala or Tamil and only by registration, descent and convention we are grouped to an ethnic group Sir.

That is the point.

Now learned geneticist had worked out a formula for the race in Sri-Lankan.

It goes like this.

1. A Muslim  = 80% Sinhala blood + 10 Tamil blood + 10% Arabian or Caucasian

2. A Tamil     = 60% Tamil blood + 30% Sinhala blood + 10 Arabic or Caucasian

3. A Sinhala man or woman = 30% Sinhala + 30 Tamil + 30 Muslim + 10 unknown, perhaps Caucasian in origin.

4. A Burgher man or woman = 85% Sinhala + 5% Tamil + 5% Muslim + 5% Caucasian

You mean to say Burghers (85%) and Muslim (80%) have more Sinhala blood.

Yes they are, they did not bring females when they settled first and they had several wives (5 for Muslims and 100 for Caucasians) and their male genes were diluted by 70% to almost 90%.

That is a scientifically establish fact, now.

What all this got to do with my participation at the wedding ceremony.

The result is anybody’s guess at the time of registration.

You have to look at the blood result and make a value judgment.

It is easy know?

One looks at the above formula and decide and a clerical staff can do that know?

Why a doctor involved? 

Wait a minute.

That is a working formula to guide a doctor but not foolproof or full proof and nobody tested from the time of the testing began had fitted exactly into any of the four categories and almost 99% were borderline cases.

Just, touch and go!

It is hair splitting and sometimes brain splitting exercise.

You know the little guy who came in.

He is a statistician.

He does some statistics and fit the guy or girl in the best fit Bell’s Curve and then decide how much skewed and on the skew score decides his or her ethnic group.

Sometimes they have to average the two scores, like the Z-Score average made by the Department of Education and then the panel sit together and decide how much Muslim, how much Sinhala, Tamil or Burgher traditions are to be enacted and incorporated in the ceremony.

Then, the Buddhist monk will decide in which book it should be registered.

Why is that?

The panel is the best for that decision, know.

When this ceremony is being held, the percentage of Buddhists have fallen to the lowest.

His duty is to increase the number of Sinhala Buddhists, so that ethnic harmony is maintained and a steady stream of guys and girls are allowed to enter the Sasana.

I do not understand.

The percentage dropped since most of the Buddhists have left the home front and joined the Sasana, like the Gautama Buddha and attained Nibbana, the Supreme.

The rest learned various foreign languages and went abroad on propagating Buddhism in the West and never returned to the motherland like an average Sri-Lankan.

 The Sinhala Buddhist population went down drastically due to their own good nature and goodwill.

The real threat is to the Buddha Sasana,

Buddhists monk cannot reverse his decision enter the lay life and procreate.

You meant to say making young ones to become a monks is a bad idea.

Not at all, since majority will attain Nibbana in one go, it is good for Buddhism.

It may be bad for heaven but on earth, by using the above formula and the panel discussion a certain quota is vested on Sinhala Buddha Sasana.

But, I thought, the Buddha Sasana is for everybody and their is no race attached to it.

That never works on earth or Sri-lanka, one has to have a political strategy, just to preserve pure Theravada or any Vada that may arise on earth.

Good Bye.

See you soon with another dream.