Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Story of Three Sri-Lankan Dogs


Story of Three Sri-Lankan Dogs

This is a story I heard from a pedigree dog (not my dog).

The dogs were having a conference at late night.

The subject matter was current political campaign at night.

Pasting of campaign posters and removing of the common candidate's posters were their theme topic.

None of the dogs were involved in plastering or removing the posters.

Their duties were to give guard and protection to stooges of their masters who were doing the dirty work at night.


They were very much disturbed.


1. One dog's master was a supporter of the ruling party.


2. The other dog's master was a supporter was the common candidate.


3. The third dog was the master dog of an election monitor.


4. The fourth dog belongs to the Election Commissioner.


The problem was with the dog of the ruling party (let me take away the master part since he is inebriated to the spinal cord and was never seen on the street but in the bar from morning to night).


It had killed three dogs in a week while guarding the poster blasters.


One was a Muslim dog.

The other was a Catholic and the third was the Buddhist dog of New Pivithuru Hela Urumaya (pronounced Karumaya) killed by accident by his own master.


The discussion was related to what happened to them after death.


The consensus was that all of them were in heaven.


Unfortunately, in a matter of few days the three masters were also killed under mysterious circumstances.


Police are still investigating.


But according to the latest news all of them are at the gate of Apaya (hell) awaiting their sentences while their dogs are enjoying a welcome respite in heaven.


So now I will brief you with the final unofficial report of the dog conference.


1. The Muslim dog's merits that served him in heaven.

He used to go to the mosque with his master five times a day without failing.

His masters demerit that warranted him summons at Apaya Gate was as follows.

He was very very religious and went to the mosque sometime more than five times.

But he volunteered for the ISIS.

His quota was killing 100 infidels in 100 days.


He actually accomplished 99 but had only one to go.


His final task was to either kill himself or to kill another (making 101) with him and remain here for little while for a prayer.


But being religious he went to the mosque for a very long final prayer.


Unfortunately he was killed by a American Bomb.



2. The Catholic dog's merits that served him in heaven.

Just like the Muslim dog he too went to the Church every Sunday without any arrears.

What was his masters demerit that warranted him summons at Apaya Gate?

He missed and absconded few visits to the Church on Sundays to meet his extramarital flame.


3. The Buddhist dog's merits that served him in heaven.

He used to go with his master with a till (Pin Kate) to collect money for the tallest Buddha Statue in the world.


What was his masters demerit that warranted him summons at Apaya Gate?

He forget to put the last 7 to 10 zeros in his final treasurer's report.


Now the story does not end here.


It was a total mismatch, 3 dogs in heaven and 3 masters in hell.


The three gods in heaven (previously Sri-Lankan Paraya dogs) finally made up their mind to rescue their masters.


Could you guess how they accomplished this task without the help of “America Drones”?


You have to wait till the Election results are declared.


The Election commissioner has given me a warning that even a small yarn or a little spin by a spin doctor that might effect the final result is a punishable offence in this world.


The caveat is that candidates can yarn any length of fibs and fabrications, till cows come home, like Lanka Cyber News.

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