Memory and Memory Loss (forgetting)
Please note this is my own opinion not subjected to any objective scientific scrutiny.
I was born with this subjective phenomenon genetically attached to me, the good memory.
It was very good as a kid for learning specially difficult subject like science but now I consider it as a handicap
Why do I say it is a handicap.
I can remember almost everything that is related to breaking rules and etiquette.
If somebody does something a human being should not do, say ill treating an animal or elephant chained, I cannot forgive this or that guy for ever.
It does not matter it is my father, mother, my superior, priests, any relative (children and dogs are excluded) an Indian, an American or any foreigner, in this country or another country or in an airport, it gets registered instantaneously and permanently.
I have learnt to modify my behavior (acute reaction, usually equal and opposite and overtly aggressive) from my childhood but the memory remains and if I do not act appropriately to my needs (it cannot be said my conscience by default) and adjust, the anger builds up like boiling steam.
Equally, I do nor fear acting on my gut impulses.
Currently writing and satire preoccupies and subdues the impact and the physiological adjustments takes it effect, very slowly at the beginning and very fast terminally, till another episode supervenes worse than the one which is subsiding.
I have many to fill few volumes in book form as regard to Ceylonese, leave alone foreigners which I am generally very indifferent if he /she being an Indian.
I relate one recent and one life long and academic.
Recently, I was doing minimal shopping in a Kandy, a young guy (behind me in the queue) did something inappropriate.
I responded and he said something to exonerate his guilt.
I blasted him to my heart’s content and my right arm was getting ready for an undercut to his chin and a below the belt to the tommy and the third probably to his vitals,
Luckily my brain is much faster than my limbs and it dawned on me that there is video camera focused directing at me.
The video camera saved the day for me and him, thankfully.
Bygone days and without a camera, the outcome would have been brutal.
The other is related to Microsoft.
I was invited for a public display of computers and utilities,many moons ago.
My task was to present (I was knew to Linux) a short presentation on Linux.
I made a quick booklet (for school children) and with my free invitation card with great difficult entered the exhibition floor of the Queens Hotel.
My item was rudely canceled at the behest of the Microsoft by the local agents.
I was very angry but did not make any outbursts since there were lot of school children and kept it for another day.
I invited few of my friends and luckily I had a wonderful professional friend to sort things out.
We ended up with some beer at the bar (before Chinthanaya came into existence, we could have drink at this bar but not now till 5 P.M. in the evening) and lunch at his home.
Rest is a long story (productive) and I did not visit the shops of those Microsoft cronies for three years. Within three years I made every new computer shop had a guy versed in Linux and over the years sent abroad minimum of ten guys (my request to them never to come back to Ceylon except on holidays).
Those days the pay for a Linux administrator, was minimum of $ 65,000/= a year.
To wind up the story, Microsoft bribed few guys from Kandy, just out of school and those guys were having drinks at a different table.
I confronted them and said that you have become indirect enemies of me.
Beware you suckers!
They tried to have a web page but we made sure it was not successful.
Those days the copyright law was not passed and three (may be even five UNPs) ministers in the current government were holding franchise and we made sure certified copies were never sold in Kandy. That is why the Microsoft guys are still bragging about it is better to have pirated copies instead of Linux.
Putting this on record on the 25th anniversary of Linux gives me great satisfaction, taking an American giant, head on.
I still thank Microsoft for making me angry (bad memory), if not for that I would have been another gullible Micro Shaft (means your vital parts)!
Let me come back to memory in a nutshell.
Memory is basically a subjective brain phenomenon.
It is very difficult to objectively assess even in an animal leave alone humans.
Most of the work was done on growing children and does not apply to adults.
In my analysis memory has a emotional content.
You remember facts, figures and events well, if you have a very dull and boring day.
Basically schooling and education are made to be dull and boring.
There is nothing else to get the brain charged, one tries to make up for that dullness by doing all the tasks of the day religiously.
But if you are depressed and stressed, you forget most of the tasks you are required to do or procrastinate (like our politicians, they are a genetically depressed lot).
In the same way, if you are happy and on vacation, you are very likely to forget most of the stuff.
An analogy is soon after the examination (unhappy period) you forget everything you studied.
That is why you forget all the presents you were asked to bring.
It you forget something (on holiday), do not blame yourself but be happy.
Forgetting is the natural defence mechanism (other is your sleep).
So in my card memory is your enemy.
Your best friend is forgetting.